C G F /////// C G Am F yeah sometimes i wonder why i'm not yet six feet under i wonder why i never had the guts to the pull the plug but i'm glad that i'm still alive, cause if that wasn't true than i never would've gotten the opportunity to meet you and i never would've have gotten the chance to sing these stupid songs the night before a certain valentine's day would inevitably go all wrong a private school education can do more to a mindset than you might think and you're part of the reason i stopped slitting my wrists, oh yeahah see this song's about one person, it's about a group instead a bunch of friends who drove those melodramatic demons out of my head a bunch of kids who somehow lifted this heavy heart of lead a bunch of friends who told me not to put a nine-millimeter bullet in my head cause demons and friends and suicide will be with me until the day i die and i'm sorry that you had to watch me cry all those times i was once a sensitive kid and i'm now i'm just a sensitive guy and my only goal in life is to not have to give you that premeditative goodbye cause demons and friends and suicide will be with me until the day i die demons and friends and suicide will be with me until the day i die demons and friends and suicide will be with me until the day i die demons and friends and suicide will be with me until the day i die

every night i pray that maslow was full of shit when he said that everybody needs food to live cause when i get older, i'll see if i can survive on american spirits and pizza crusts and colt 45s and i know i might seem like a poseur cause i'm going against my own lifestyle but it's only natural when you're in denial of your economic class you don't hate your mom and dad, you just don't like what they believe poseurs unite, yeah, poseurs unite if you've got a little poseur in you, i want you to sing with me tonight cause i'm straight and i'm a male and i'm guilty of being white i misinterpreted those minor threat lyrics but i think that they are a nice way to describe an identity crisis, that you can go through at the youngest possible age if you need me i'll be at the worcester common trying to figure out what it is that i believe freight trains might not be in my future, but the least i can do is give them a shot from now on i'll focus on what i am, and not what i am not the punkest thing i can do is disagree with the wingnuts the punkest thing i can do is disagree with all the dishwashers the punkest thing i can do is disagree with the unionists cause god knows i can't be punk any other way

a good friend of mine left his sweatshirt behind at a camp we worked at last summer i was staying a few more weeks than him, so i had no choice but to take it home with me at the end of the summer the sweatshirt was special because it reminded me of him it had a name on the back his name was jake, but the sweatshirt said "cam" his name was jake, but the sweatshirt said "cam" i would ask him sometimes, "why do you call yourself cam?" and he would say "it's my evil alter ego!" and i never understood him when he said that cause those are for superheroes alter egos are for superheroes and then one day in the fall i was talking to him on the phone and he said, "remember that time i stole a car? well, it wasn't me that stole that car, it was actually cam the whole time, it was cam all along!" and i said, "jake, that kind of makes sense, but i need to give it some time to digest, some to digest" two weeks later, i had figured it all out so i grabbed a pencil and paper and i wrote this song down what i figured out was that there's a little cam in all of us whether you believe it or not and if you agree with me then meet me at midnight in the walgreen's parking lot and we'll tag vulgar words on every major building in town and we'll slash everybody's tires and we'll burn this (goddamn) city down and we'll do all these deeds in the name of cam mccleod cause a friend that didn't change anything wasn't worth it at all

all i can hope for is that i end up on your basement floor a couple more times before the end of this year cause i'd be lying if i said i didn't like the linoleum and those cheesy jokes at three am and with that green apple something or other, i bet that we could live forever but right now my romantic life don't matter cause i've been talking to you for the past half hour and i just want you to tell me tomorrow about what i was talking about tonight but there's a good chance i won't forget anyway

for the next seven decades, i'll spend my time writing songs and for the last five minutes i've my life, i'll realize it was time spent wrong cause i shoulda raised a family and i shoulda got a job and i should have learned to love and i should have never been a slob and i should have been proactive, cause that's how people have fun and i should have been determined, cause that's how shit gets done but all these shouldas and couldas and wouldas will try to haunt me til i'm dead but they won't be able to get through these sheets of my nice warm bed and if i had to pick a political affiliation based off the logo, then i would be an anarchist for sure cause there's nothin' like circlin' the A with spraypaint on the side of every cop car door in this town and when i finally leave this wretched place i will take all of the cops' cans of pepper spray it'll be awfully hard to stop me from leavin' when their faces are red and their eyes are bleedin' but it'd be unfair to assume that i hate all the cops cause i've been taught to respect them ever since i was a tot it'll probably take decades to redirect that train of thought do they protect us, or do they noooooooooooot well i'm a creep i'm a weirdo what the hell am i doing here? i don't belong here i don't belong here

when i read harry potter, i will think of jeremy and when i read a book about cameras, i will think of evan connolly and when i read fear and loathing, i'll think of connor bowen and when i read a stars wars comic book, i'll think of jake bertwell and when i read slaughterhouse V, i will think of eliza and when i read about vegemite, i'll think of carolyn and laura and when i read a post-secret book, i'll think of emily and when i read radical literature, i will think of ali and all i can ask is that when you hear this song, you'll think of me yeah all i can ask is that when you hear this song, you'll think of me

i guess no one ever told you when you were little that interests don't become problems til they turn into actions into attractions, into attractions that ruin people's lives oh you're a monster, you're a monster, yes i know that for sure you would have taken those secrets to the grave if you could i don't know that much about you, i don't know that much about you but there's one thing that i know for sure, i know you've got some blood on your hands, you've got some blood on your hands and there's only one man who will scrub that blood off and he goes by the name of satan but he won't do it for free, no, you gotta give him some pay satan'll scrub that blood off your hands for minimum wage and he'll say, "stop that cryin' and stop those tears you're only gonna have to live with me for the next billion trillion years" and you'll say, "can i go now? i promise to never be a bother" and he'll say, "you can leave when this place freezes over, you can leave when this fucking place freezes over"

please mom can i hang out with the people that i met at food not bombs the other day? there's a movie night going on at the collective and it's just a silly metaphor for anarchy please dad can i go to that show in worcester? those nights are the best i've ever had i know you went to school there and i know that it's a tough neighborhood, but you gotta let me go there just this once just this once just this once just this once just this once